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Writings Off The Wall
Daily…
My head is full of buzzing activity
With intricate sounds, pondered ideas, musical pictures and shapes
One song, I remember and create a three part harmony to
Another song I am creating in “the moment”
Both simultaneously
Theories abound
Some with words never pronounced in this life
All the while, pictures are flashing, lightning fast
Things I have stamped/absorbed into memory
Others I have only dreamed of
In day or night dreams
Waves upon waves of thought & music
Flashes of memory & sound
Swatches of patterns coming at me in a hypnotically flowing dance of color
It is time for bed
And once again…
Sleep will be the nights challenge
Copyright © 2005 Patti Shepard
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This was something that I wrote recently, for my son on his 29th birthday. It’s funny how quickly those years race by when you’re not looking. This was my first son and he towers above me in height, but I will always see him as my Own Little One (I’m sure, to his embarrassment, too).
You were my own little one
So tiny in a world so big
So soft and vulnerable
In a world so hard and manipulative
You were my own little one
Nestled in my arms who would believe
You had saved my life?
Such an innocent little lamb
So amazing to behold
Look at those tiny hands
How could something so small
Hold the love of so many
Your love kept me grounded
Even when my self-esteem was low
I knew I was someone special
I am your mother and you love me
Your love so unconditional
In a world full of conditions
Every smile melts my heart
Your young but wise observations
Took my breath away
My job is to teach you
But you have taught me so much more
My heart nearly broke the first day of school
You told me you were a big boy now
You didn’t need my hand to hold
You boldly went into the unknown
Choosing to face this new challenge
Alone
Such strength of Will
Something I always wished for
There it is -In the soul of my Firstborn
To watch you in Sports or on Stage
Was pure delight for me
I would live my life through your experiences
(Although it was never my conscience intent
To make you share this with me)
Your life was so different from what I had known
All the things I ever wanted to be – You Are
All that I ever wanted to do – You Achieve
You never cease to amaze me
You make me proud to know you
You make me wish to be better
Watching you go off to college was the Best (and Worst) feeling for me
I was so very happy for you
I just didn’t know what I was going to do without you
When you went on that missionary trip I was afraid of losing you
When you went off to College I knew I was losing you
I knew – like the first day of school – you did not need my hand to hold
I knew that holding your hand from now on would be a rare occasion
But I knew that I was still loved
I was still special
I was still your mother
Watching you recite your wedding vows
Watching you graduate from college – alas no film in the camera!
Watching you become a Father for the first time
And the second time!
All of these memories & more are secured deep in my heart
You have given me more people to love
And be loved by
A daughter - my first!
Two wonderful Grandsons – so loving and intelligent
You have blessed me in so many ways
You have made me so very proud
I am proud of the man you have become
On this your twenty-ninth year of living
I wish you happiness
Also…
I hope that you’ll see that even though life can be hard
And sometimes life’s lessons can be
Like a bitter pill to swallow
Through it all God will provide such great joy
But Always - In the simple things in life
A baby’s smile
A sunny day
A child’s prayer
A goodnight hug and kiss
A hand to hold
Always know that I love you my Dear Son
Copyright © 2005 Patti Shepard
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Inertia
I wish to take a drive through the countryside
Looking for the perfect place to hike or perhaps
A place to stop and have a picnic
It's Such a Beautiful Day
Maybe it would be better to work in my garden
Feeling the sunshine drenching me in warmth
Making me feel so alive and one with nature
Possibly this would be a better day to take a walk with my two dogs
Yes, today would be a wonderful day for playing & exploring every nook and cranny of the woods
Taking time to pull off my shoes and cool my toes in the running water of the shallow brook
Before racing my furry pals over the bridge to other exciting adventures
I know I would enjoy finishing the watercolor I started last week of the field –
Yes, today would be an ideal day to capture the wildflowers in all of their glory
But it would also be enjoyable to sit on the porch and finish my knitting while the cat plays lazily with the ball of yarn at my feet
I bought a most fabulous pattern and cloth the other day
In a matter of just a few hours I could make myself the most beautiful blouse
I would love to be able to wear my new blouse on Sunday
I know I need to clean my house though, before someone comes to call on me…
It is a perfect day to chat with friends or family members that drop in
While sipping iced tea on the patio casually or perhaps even cooking out
My website needs a few updates and changes, too – so many new pictures to add
Oh but isn’t it a lovely day to take a few more pictures!
I could catch a bird in flight or the sun streaming through the trees just so
Maybe I should take off for the great unknown – so many things to do –
My head is spinning with the possibilities –
Perhaps this would be the day to live life to the fullest…..sigh*
Instead
I turn my gaze from the living room wall, to look out the window once again, at the quickly escaping day.
Copyright © 2005 Patti Shepard
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